20/09/2002 - 7:19 p.m.

I am half-sick of shadows.

What do you call it when your earlobe develops a large lump sort of thing and swells up and hurts like hell even when you're not touching it? I have no holes in my ears, so it is definately not piercing related. It's not fatal seeming enough to bother going to the health centre, but it's odd enough to make me obsess about it everytime I have about ten minutes with nothing better to do.

I had a bizarre dream last night that I would say to be related to my ear pain, but I'm not sure. I dreampt that Megan (the grad student helping out with Fundies) was giving me a tattoo. I'd not really wanted it, but Jess, for some reason, had talked me into it and so I got some really stupid tiny black writing on my shoulder. This doesn't even begin to make sense to me.

Today in math I finished reading Pippin. That would be such an awesome show to see a large theatre do. There is so much magic and colour and effect that can be used, and it needs to be huge, then it was orginially choreographed by Fosse so that just adds to it. It's a pretty good script too, for what it is. There's so much that a director has the opportunity to do with it.

Taking Walt's Outhouse to No Shame tonight.

Incidently, I made my decision about camp today. I'm not going to go back. I found out a few more things that helped my decision immensely. I wish I were going back, but knowing what I know now, I can't do it. I doubt with too much certainty that I would not get the benefits out of camp that I wanted. This especially when weighed against all that I would have to give up to go there- the places I could go, the things I could do. I mean, I could possibly get a real job that I enjoyed (that paid better) and gave me time off and a chance to do some things. I could possibly take some summer classes. I could possibly take a vacation and go some places. I could even look into Camp Adventure (as Rachelle suggested to me the other day) and play an International Counselor in Australia or something. As much as I want to go back and see all my favourite campers and maybe even be on programme staff this year, I can't step willingly into what I know I would be getting. We'll see what the summer after brings, I guess. This marks the second summer since I was a third grade Brownie that I'll not have been there.

Fortune cookie of the day (THEY'RE BACK!): You are always welcome in any gathering.