27/04/2002 - 6:12 p.m.

You say you want a revolution?

OK, I promise I that this entry won't mention the LOTR soundtrack. I won't mention that at this moment I am listening to it and have finally worked out all of the words to all of the songs.

However, today's window to my world is good. Much better than previous ones. I promise. It really is. No mention of the aforementioned sountrack, well, OK, no other mention...(Where's that crowd from Monty Python to yell "get on with it" when I need them?)

Roosevelt High School in Des Moines, IA decided to break the Guinness World Record for The World's Largest Hug on Thursday (because we didn't have school on Friday).

The old record was 800 some people and so they decided:

"Hey, we've got 1600 some people in the building. Why don't we all stand in concentric circles with our arms around each other on the front lawn, and that'll break the record!"

"It'll promote citizenship and goodwill! Let's do it."

"Hey, how do we make absolutely sure that we break the record?"

"Let's make it mandatory!"

"Gee, that's a great idea!"

The teachers moaned and complained, the students moaned and complained, and finally, the teachers were told at a meeting that they were not allowed to badmouth the hug anymore, and that everyone would be doing it. It was a required activity. I have heard this straight from a couple of teachers. This was the state of things. I was rather bothered by the "mandatory" statement, and also by the fact that to have the Guinness people officiate requires money and time to drag them in from England. Apparently, that didn't matter, they were just going to ring them up and tell them and all would be well.

So we had a mandatory fire drill and then were required to form a circle on the lawn and, at the appointed time, place your arms around the people on either side of you (not me, I told Maria not to touch me, and the stranger next to me that if she touched me I would kill her). Pictures were taken and the ex mayor smiled and said it was good and the students went back into class safe in the knowledge that they had broken a world record, although the official announcement would be made 4th hour.

The record for The World's Largest Group Hug? 2000 something, broken only weeks before by a high school in Minnesota. I laughed until I cried.

Although, now I have another little problem. I went to the Guinness website to see what their requirements for setting a record included and I waas right, it is necessary to contact them in advance and pay to fly a representative out to witness the setting of the record. So, really we couldn't have set a record anyway- it wouldn't have been official.

However, I then discovered the origins of the Guinness World Records. You know that rather popular British beer? Guinness? Well, they're the sponsors and creators of the World Records. The records were created specifically for the promotion and advertisement of the Guinness name and product.

The Des Moines Public Schools have two policies that specifically prohibit this type of thing. Firstly, we have the policy stating that students cannot promote substances they cannot legally buy. Budweiser or Joe Camel t-shirts may not be worn in the public schools. I would say that an event held specifically for the promotion of an alcholic drink is against the district policy. I would also say, then, that being required to participate in this was in violation of my civil rights. I am not supposed to be required by anyone to break the law.

Why was this allowed? Why was nothing said? If I were to wear a Joe Camel shirt to school on Monday, I would be in the office, but other people were allowed to force the entire school to promote Guinness.

I'm gonna try and raise a little hell about this one. It doesn't matter that we didn't break the record. They shouldn't have required us to do it.