23/05/2002 - 8:09 p.m.

For we were young and sure to have our way

Tonight was the LAST NIGHT of the class that's sapping my will to live! All I have to do now is finish driving on the 30th and then I will have failed miserably. Well, in my estimation. The only reason I took the damn course in the first place was so I wouldn't have to go to the DOT, and from everything he's said I probably will anyway. I just want to go get the fucking thing to make my parents happy- none of this drive for the official people thing. If I promised him I would never use it (which I don't think I will) would he just let me have it? He says it's only whether he would want us to be on the road or not whether he makes us take the DOT test, so if I'm not going to be on the road??? I need to get some sleep.

You know, as of today, if I wanted to, I would never have to speak French again. Well, I probably will anyway- it's too useful. I hope Kally does well with the Russian and all next year and, hey, if she becomes Tolkien Jr., that'll be cool.

It's too weird, I have literally two days of school left. It's hardly been like I've even had finals. For French, Drama and English it's been projects, for Chemistry I don't think we're even having a test, for choir, well, come on, a test??? For Algebra II I did 16 problems off the actual 50 problem final and he'll score me out of 20 or so, so the only thing I have to worry about is the Government final on Tuesday morning my last day of school. Then, technically graduation is the first and that's when school ends, but I'm not going.

My mother's trying to force me to go to the senior party now that it's too late. Not that I want to go anyway, not that I would have anybody to be with.

I keep getting asked to all this senior stuff- most recently, Carin's asked me to her senior recital at 10:00 on Saturday. I ought to go, but I really don't want to. Is it wrong of me to make up an excuse??

I wonder whether my guilt switch is normal or not. I think I get extremely guilty over things, so I try to ignore it, but am I really just turning down what keeps everybody else normal?

Mr. Dingo was going on today (he's retiring this year, you see) about how he's glad that he taught us all how to think. Excuse me??? He didn't teach me how to think, I bloody knew that one already. No, he just tossed a bunch of random useless philosophy our way and gave us his opinions.

I am so asking Mr. Pfander what he's doing on the 30th, I've got to be at school because of that last little bit of 6 AM hell, so maybe I can just hang out in there and have some English class to finish the year out with.