31/10/2001 - 10:51 p.m.

Dress rehearsal

Actually, contrary to the tone of former moans, I have nothing miserable to say, and I didn't end up pissed off. I got the Maria thing sorted out, so that's OK. Josie was dressed and out on stage in time (at least, close enough). All in all, I guess I'm feeling kind of blah about the whole thing. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I expect it'll go well, but maybe nothing spectacular or anything. I don't know whether I want alumni to see it or not.

Failed my Chemistry test quite miserably. I finally work out the compound shit, and we move on to moles. Well, OK, I can recite Avocado's number and all, and I can say "When in doubt convert to the mole", but it's everything that turns up on the test questions and then the mathematical stuff that I simply don't even know how to do. And you know what- I don't really care how many moles of chalk it takes to write my name! That's why I didn't do the bloody one page lab, OK? I simply can't be bothered to DO that when I've got so much else to do. (My communication's done, it just hasn't gone out. Ugh.)

Oh, I have to write a damn 13th paragraph for Grendel, about Mama Grendel. OK, that is so completely out of the style and set up of the book, but I don't really care to explain the epigraph, write a comparison of the book to some other Gardner quote about existensialism, or trace the astrology and influence of the zodiac in each chapter, so I'm stuck with Chapter 13. I don't know, maybe it'll prove to the old booger that I can at least write fiction (because I think he doesn't think I can write expository, well nobody's had any problem before now, unless they had no comprehensive grasp of the English language: what's wrong with Holcolmb?). It'll have to be about the mother's intuitive nature (the very thing I denounced yesterday, but there is no way for her to fight the role Gardner placed her in), and instead of the zodiac, just earth (physical as opposed to astral).

Oops, got to go.