18/10/2003 - 8:05 p.m.

How can I get this car out of second gear?

I've signed up (against my better judgement, I expect) for NaNoWriMo. I haven't decided whether or not to write here, or on my word processor. If I write it online (the way I'm thinking, though I haven't decided whether to go here or perhaps get a new diary for it), you may all see it, and there might even be an entry every day. We'll see.

I'm considering quitting in the scene shop. I don't really enjoy the conditions under which I'm working. It is my opinion that there is no job I need so badly that being fired from it is a threat. It seems to be the only threat our new Technical Director knows: "Anybody standing around gets fired," "If you're not there, you're fired," "Do it now, or you're fired." I could care less, personally. Although, some of my complaint comes from the fact that the guy is very unwilling to explain things. We get a lot of directions like "there are the legs, put them on the platform". How does he want them on the platform? Is there any particular placement for the legs? What will it be used for? Well, if we ask, we get treated like stupid children (I've been asked on two or three seperate occasions who hired me and why haven't I had Stagecraft class yet). If we don't ask, and we screw it up, he gets pissed and treats us like stupid children.

Personally, I don't need it. I can go someplace else. I'm not a production major, I'm taking the work study for fun (you know, and because the university gave me the work study in the first place), so I've been looking around and I think I could work for the same pay and the same hours in the Art Dept. Library, which sounds fun.

Nathan's truck is spending the weekend in CR for repairs, so he had his father's automatic. Took me out today to have me do some driving. Basically, if I ever park, I'm going to have to park way out where there are no more cars. We were in an empty parking lot for half an hour and we estimated that, had there been cars, I probably had about twenty accidents. He wants me to learn to drive manual on his truck, but it being easier to learn manual after you know how to drive in the first place, he's trying to get me better anyway.

I know I need to learn. I know I need to have a license. I'm not even being stubborn anymore, I'm just not any good at it. Nathan has no comprehension. Well, that's not true- we've come to the conclusion that I am to reading as he is to driving. He doesn't understand having to learn to drive- it's just something that you do, what's so difficult about that?

I honestly cannot remember from one time to the next which pedal the brake is. I have no concept of where mirrors are supposed to be adjusted to. It's a battle to remember which way to hit the turn signal for a turn. I have no idea which way the wheel is supposed to go for reverse. And, frankly, there are times that I forget which side of the road we drive on in this country. I don't get it. How are you supposed to manage all this stuff as well as pay attention to all the other people on the road and the basic laws of the road? How can driving be a freedom, a release?

I haven't yet recived my replacement roommate, and I don't think I will be getting her. Hooray for having the room all to myself again, eh?